


I Will RUB Him And SQUEEZE Him!

by StarkRogers



Category: Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms, Sherlock Holmes (Downey films)
Genre: Attempted Rape, Crack, M/M, looney tunes reference
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-15
Updated: 2012-08-15
Packaged: 2017-11-12 05:22:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,184
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/487163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarkRogers/pseuds/StarkRogers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Copyright: This is an original work of fiction. Sherlock Holmes is public domain, making this piece of work legally mine. You may not reproduce or publish this work on any site or in any journal or any other form of media without my permission. </p><p> </p><p>Inspired by the classic Looney Tunes cartoon where a large monster finds Daffy Duck and mistakes him for a rabbit. Only this time, it's Holmes and Dredger. See Notes for translations of Babelfish French.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Will RUB Him And SQUEEZE Him!

"All right, what's holding up the works?" Holmes cursed, pushing at the door he'd just spent fifteen seconds lock picking. Watson was nowhere to be found, of course. He would have kicked the door down by now. Holmes checked behind him just in case… but no. No Watson. The ungrateful louse had gone and gotten married, of course. Well, engaged. Technically. All of which was irrelevant to the fact that this _door_ (he leaned against it once more) was _not_ (and yet again, with feeling!) openi--

"What's all the…!" Holmes fell through the door suddenly and found himself at the foot of someone quite impossibly tall. He looked up… and up… and up… and then leaned back on his heels for the last three inches. "The… the…" Then he let out a most ungentlemanly squeak when the behemoth grinned. Terrible dental work…

"Ooh… un petit lapin mignon…" Dredger rumbled in a deep voice. "J'ai toujours voulu un…" Holmes had a strong sense that the man did not intend to keep him as a house pet. Rather, his meaning was far more… carnal. Holmes' face twitched slightly and he swallowed the rock that had formed in his throat. The giant knelt down and lifted Holmes bodily into the air by his lapels. He pressed Holmes against the doorframe, sandwiching him there by thrusting his oversized thigh between Holmes' legs, and trapping his arms painfully behind his back. Dredger kept crooning, stroking Holmes' face with sausage-like fingers.

"Je vous appellerai George…" The behemoth said as he drew a thumb along Holmes' lips. Coal, sewage and… sugar?

"My name is _not_ George, it's -" He was silenced as the disgusting thumb was shoved inside his mouth, gagging him. The ogre pressed against him, nearly suffocating him against the wall, running his free hand down Holmes' shirt, undoing the buttons roughly.

"Je tu choierai," he said as he pawed at Holmes' groin. The detective squirmed, growing hard against his will. "Et tu étreindrai." The giant removed his thumb from Holmes' mouth and pressed the hand against against his neck, drawing out the last of his breath. "Et tu _serrerai_ …" With that, Dredger's huge hand had somehow opened Holmes' pants and slipped out his engorged member, squeezing it unpleasantly tight. Holmes squirmed even more, hopelessly trying to escape.

"You're hurting me…" Holmes rasped, managing to draw only enough breath to remain conscious. "Put me down, please." His pleading was more than sincere; it was verging on desperate as the giant continued roughly manipulating his member. More unnerving, Dredger had begun breathing heavily, his rank breath wafting down over Holmes' face as the huge man's tented pants ground painfully against his hips.

"Et frottez-tu et caressez-tu!" The behemoth grunted, gaining speed against Holmes' bruised hips. Finally, the detective had experienced enough displeasure and snapped, losing his patience and his composure. 

"I am _not_ a petit lapin!" he cried, and batted at Dredger's ears with his recently freed arms. The tall man seemed stunned for a moment, but it was as if his massive size meant signals took longer to be processed by his brain. Unfortunately for Holmes, Dredger just chuckled darkly and grabbed both of Holmes' hands in one steel grip, pulling them above his head. Holmes struggled, but the grip was firm and unyielding.

"Pas un petit lapin, George? Alors pourquoi avez-tu une queue pelucheuse?" Holmes' eyes widened as Dredger waggled his abused member around, and he felt himself flushing. A fluffy tail, indeed! "Pourquoi, petit lapin?" the tall man crooned, nuzzling against the top of Holmes' head, a hot slimy tongue snaking towards his ear. Holmes shuddered again, pulling away as much as he could.

"A fluffy tail? That's not a fluffy tail that's a… a riding crop," he said, wildly groping for the first words that came to his mind. He then mentally kicked himself, but decided to try and work with it. "Now, please put me down?" he asked, cocking his head to the side, arching his back and attempting to look as alluring as possible. It seemed to be his only chance for escape. Dredger seemed to be considering it, and lowered Sherlock to the floor. The moment the detective was free he made a mad dash to slip out and around the door, but it seemed the giant's arms were nearly ten feet long. He was caught once more.

Dredger laughed, throwing Holmes down on one of the workshop tables. As he finished sliding, Holmes looked up and noticed a strange, pronged tool, but didn't have time to speculate on its purpose before the huge man was roughing him up once more, dragging his hips down to the edge of the table and turning him onto his stomach. The gorilla held Holmes down by smashing his face into the table with one hand, immobilizing him. 

"Ooh George, vous êtes un petit lapin vilain! Je tu punirai bon!" Dredger growled, smirking down at Holmes. For his part, Holmes whimpered a bit, shifting his hips quickly and attempting to ensure that his naked member would not be crushed too badly against the edge of the table once what he assumed was coming began. Dredger ripped down Holmes' pants, exposing his backside. He caressed it gently with huge, calloused hands for a few moments. Then heat of his hand left Holmes' behind and he tensed, an eternal moment of anticipation stretching out before contact.

Holmes bit back the first few spanks, but Dredger was unforgiving and not pulling his hits, and after a fifth hit left his backside burning and his front side aching, he cried out. The sixth and seventh followed in quick succession, leaving Holmes clinging to the table and quaking. 

"L… Look, I'll do whatever you like, just stop, please!" Holmes choked out. He needed to distract the behemoth, catch him off guard again some how, hit him when he was weakest--

A loud rapport echoed within the walls of the workshop, and both Dredger and Holmes turned towards the source: John H. Watson, with his revolver. Never had Holmes been so thankful and so ashamed to see his good partner in justice than at this moment.

"It's about time, Watson."

"Sorry Holmes. I had to dispose of the other two. I was almost in a cab when I changed my mind, I'll have you know."

Holmes decided not to bother asking about the "other two" at this precise time. Instead, he used Dredger's distraction to reach up and grab the strange apparatus he'd seen before. He twisted, and touched it to the surprised French man's chest. He went flying through a wall, causing general pandemonium. Holmes stood and stuffed himself back into his pants. 

"Are you -"

"Yes I'm fine Watson," Holmes replied before Watson even finished the question. They walked over to the hole in the wall, where a stunned Dredger was attempting to sit up. Holmes zapped him again, and his upper body flew backwards, knocking him unconscious as his head, thick as it was, impacted on the hard floor.

"By the way, that's "vous" to you," Holmes spat, stalking away with Watson.

**Author's Note:**

> *Translations*  
> "Ooh, a cute little rabbit…"  
> "I've always wanted one…"  
> "I will name you George…"  
> "I will pet you,"  
> "And hug you,"  
> "And squeeze you…"  
> "And rub you and caress you!"  
> "Not a little rabbit, George? Then how come you have a fluffy tail?"  
> "How come, little rabbit?"  
> "Ooh George, you are naughty little rabbit! I will punish you good!"
> 
> For those who don't know French, Dredger was often using the intimate term for "you", tu, which is for close friends/family. Certainly not for the man you are raping in a warehouse! "Vous" would be more appropriate for that. Which is why Holmes said what he did at the end.


End file.
